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My feelings on black people using the word N*gga

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The n*gga word is a cancer and I have used it.
It’s an addiction and I have to stop it.
I won’t lie, in this poem will be honest.
I heard this in R rated movies and rap lyrics.
I love rap music and always will.
Some lyrics are so cold, it gives me chills
and I’m being for real.
There are a lot of black men I look up to,
like Martin Luther King, Barack Obama, Kobe Bryant, Leborn James, there are many more
but I’m just naming a few.
The one black man I admire the most is Malcolm X.
He stands for what he believes in, a strong Muslim that fought for black independence.
Sometimes I wish he still existed and was still living.
I wish I had half the heart that he did.
Because in the 1960’s in America, it was a lot of racist shit back then.
The world was violent for African Americans
and Blacks were outnumbered by the educated whites but Malcolm still choose to fight.
He tried to fight the black man war in America
and I can’t even show up prepared to my own battle.
It’s so sad though thinking about what this world have came to.
I wonder what would Malcolm would do?
I wished he was still alive.
Now in the fourth line of this poem,
I stated ” Some lyrics are so cold, it gives me chills
and I’m being for real”.
Listening to hardcore rap is a good feel
but yet and I hate to say it, because I don’t like to judge other men
but rap has increased the ignorance.
This is old news.

For years gangsta rap has been in the news.
Now I believe almost all rappers mean well
and I get it, its business and they have to make record sales.
N*ggas, bitches*, gunshots, these words in rap lyrics sale.
I’m guilty of using the word ‘n*ggas’ and referring to women as ‘b*tches’.
Truth be told, words have the power to build and destroy, its an addiction.
I was listening to a few Malcolm X speeches, and I also saw a youtube video of his daughter speaking(I will post a video below) about her opinion on the n*gga word
and it made me think.
I want to be a strong black man, but I can’t unless I get rid of my demons.
The negative words I have been using for years.
Now the slang definition of n*gga
N*gga – A word that only black people use to call there homies if a white person uses it they are some deep shit.
Forget about the word n*gga and think about it like this.
How can you get mad about something somebody else do or say to you
if your doing it yourself?
This question I just asked is a poison that not came out the closet
because we only care about how we treat ourselves but not others.
This world is full of hypocrites.
Now nobody is perfect, and like I said, numerous times I have said ‘n*gga’
but I must stop it and I will pray I never use this word again.
Now maybe not all black would agree, but I’m just saying what I believe.

There are plenty of black intelligent people that are capable of achieving many things that use the word “n*gga” on a daily basis but in this world, sad to say, but you barely get judged by what’s in your heart and by  your actions, but very quickly you  get judged by what you have, what you wear and what you say.

Now everybody is welcome to comment on this

Should black people use the word n*gga?

Please look at this video below:

Death Tried To Follow But Couldn’t Keep Up

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My mind is desolate
my world is dark as its ever been.
It feels like death follows me.
I tried to remain nowhere to be seen,
but I’m being stalked to death
by death.
He knows the size and shape of shadow
and he didn’t use a measuring tape.
Should I dig my own grave and drift to other side?
Is it time to end my life, should I commit suicide?
Jump off NYC buildings, shoot full metal jackets, drinking bleach, or starve myself to death
before I become next.
I don’t run away, I refuse to get chased
but I’m too arrogant to get slayed
by deaths name
so should I put myself in harms way
by my own hands, I think this too myself
while drinking straight liquor without a chase.
Forget the precious creation of my face, I’m running out of time and death
just jumped ahead to second place from eight place.
Death shall not win my race, I will always be first place.
This is my race, I created the track, death just runs on it.

She Is A Flirt

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Black leggins , ass shows, shes a flirt.

She blew a kiss at the Jill Scott concert.

Black heels, leggings match, captivating

And I front like my dick not erecting.

Instinct like tarzan being king of the jungle.

I know you don’t love me, headed for trouble

Ass twerking, titties poppin, moves seductive.

Eyes watching like celebrities at the red carpet entrance.

Eyes flashin, a gurdain angel built like Satan

leading to a sticky situations.

Hoes don’t trust them, but I don’t listen.

Thought I was forever untouchable,

but god made my persona humbled.

Because yesterday I was Superman,

but today begging for backup plans.

Long strokes made my heart pumps,

and the sperm cums.

I blast it simutanteloulsy,

while beatin it like tap drums.

Release it in 30 seconds like five long deep breaths.

Wished had butter hands to miss this catch

when she threw her name in my palms.

Flirtatious adavnces, extremely contiguous,

made sins outrageous, thoart sore and face sweats.

Stench of dirreherra in my sweats.

Intercourse was raw like Eddie Murphy scene.

Had her on her kness, her thighs my face was in between

but she put me in a wheel cheer intentionally.

The lust was addicting like candy, her voice was tempting, she moved seductively, my strokes were sastfiying, but yet secretly destroying me, when sperm kept cuming like royalty checks for publishing poetry.

The lust is still addicting, I’m admitting

in embrasssement, since her sudden disappearance, I’m still ejacaulating, for hallcuintating, that releasing of semen.

Damn she was a freak and damn she was a flirt.

90 Day Rule

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Questions

  1. Have any of you ever read the Steve Harvey book “Act like a lady, Think like a man” book?
  2.  Is 90 day too long to wait for sex?
  3. Is 90 day too soon to have sex?

Life In Jail

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Have plenty of responsibilities
but need a break, a 15 minute visit.
The phone to my ear, while taking
to those of you on the other side of the glass.
Mental slavery is worst than physical slavery.
Limited movement due to lack of freedom
the burden weighs very heavily
and breaking me down mentally.
A very long and ardouous journey
wishing on a freedom thats never guaranteed.
No matter how many times I change channel
still nothing on TV.
No matter how many times the menu switch,
my belly is still empty.
Food is so nasty.
No matter how many times I exercise
I gain weight, but still feel scrawny.
No matter how many times I clean
the stench in the environment is still nasty.
A bad dream you never wake up from.
Noisy environment loud enough to hurt your ear drums.
So I have pleasant dreams in my sleep
and waking up to a nightmare.
Life is a nightmare with my worst fears.
Trying to move forward but constantly
looking back
Life is a shank that waits around the corner at a blind spot
watching me, calculating my every move.
Once in life’s view, it strikes at the side at my preipheral.
I’m leaking on the floor without any towles and tisssues.
A scar for life across the body makes me angry, and holds me back mentally.
Parnoid as hell, every movement now I make
have me overthiniking.
Life is a life sentence and its makes me lonely.
Going to bed with sexaul images in my mind
and I wake up horny.
Its a situation where a dream just stay a dream
and never comes true.
I, as a person will never grow, but the paranoia just grew.
Just raise a caveman from dead and give him a position
In the Information Technology department.
Just think about that and imagine that?

When Love Is Not Lasting

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What’s the matter?
What’s the confusion?
It’s suppose to last forever
so why this conclusion?
Incorrect hypothesis
lead to an unsolved mystery.
Murder in the 1st degree
a relationship is just another casualty.
Everyday love is found
Everyday love is lost.
Some days, love is peaceful
Some days, love is at war.
Some days are heaven
Some days feel like
the battle of Armageddon.
Victory we seek
but not guaranteed
because only one choice is worthy
out of two outcomes.
Romantic relations arrive
like weekly income
but most can’t manage to save it
and make it last.
Disagreements and arguments
are more ruthless, leading
to hurt feelings
but yet on Instagram,
the smiles wide
like Cumulonimbus clouds
in the sky.
Deep inside the cloud
it’s defined as a nimbostratus.
Dark raining cloud above
your relationship
gave you a complicated status.
We try to demonstrate hood actions
but disagreements hold more weight
since agreements is light
like a feather
and yet the weather is bright
How ironic right?
Sometimes things are not meant to be
Maybe because love is preexisting,
Meaning your heart is a hard drive
with a partition that’s stored with memories
of previous love letters and romantic dates
images of a previous face.
You refuse to erase the data stored
and don’t have much space
for a new face.

 

Question

Can you comment below and list at least one double entendre I provided?

 

 

Podcast

I have an episode that I will be uploading tonight on my Podcast.

Name of the upcoming episode will be “Sex on the First Date“.

On this episode, I will be explaining, my opinion about sex on the first date, why I believe people have sex on the first date and do I recommend people to have sex on the first date?

 

 

 

 

 

My Love Is Everlasting

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I can save your soul
and love you 1000 ways
I adore you like gold
You’ll forever dwell in 1st place
You are my trophy
and I have made space
Inside my heart
which is home
where I provide space
for your precious face
which imitates a diamond
shine like police sirens.
A sweet taste
of your breast
on my tounge
Your the Colgate
that santazies
my gums
and keep me healthy
like plums.
Our differences mix
together well
like rum
in apple cider.
Splendid
like shells
on the beach
when united together.
No matter the weather
Whether
A dark storm or bright sunlight
its always a bright day
and I love the smile on your face.
and I plan to keep it that way.
I look tough but my love for you
is more than enough.
I love you more than life.
I will love you until the day I die.
Like a plane in the sky,
I feel high.
Relaxed and feel like I’m
in a different zone, different world
but my lungs is healthy
heart full of love.
I provide entertainment and
you love to watch me
like a sitcom.

My First Open Mic Experience

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Last year in June 24, 2018, I went to an poetry open mic night at the bowery club in NYC to recite “Should I Go To An Open Mic“. It was such a lovely and yet nerve wrecking experience. I have always hated public speaking(especially when my family is around) but I had a few reasons why I decided to overcome my fear and go to the bowery club

Reasons I decided to overcome my fear

1) I was procrastinating for 2 years and being lazy

2) The weekend of June 24 was birthday weekend

3) I need to branch out more and let people hear my poems.

Reasons Why I Was Nervous

1) It was my first time ever performing at an open mic event and I had doubts I wouldn’t be good enough

2) My girlfriend volunteered to come with me to show support and I really wanted to go alone lol.

How I felt After I recited my poem

1) I felt like a super standing when I got a big round of applause from everbody

2) I realized that performing at an open mic event is nothing to be nerevous about.

3) I became more motivated to improve my writing skilss as a poet.

Moral of this post is to let everbody reading this to know that being nervous is nomral. It’s normal to to have doubts. Sometimes we might procrastinate. Sometimes we might make excuses to get out of things. Nobody is perfect but if you really have a dream, don’t nobody stop you from achieving it. Fight your negative thinking and don’t be afraid to fail because being afraid to fail and living in fear could make you regretful for missing out on an life time opportunity.

To Tiffanee:

I don’t know if you will ever read this or not, but I just want to say thank you coming with me to my first open mic experience and supporting me. I thank you for celebrating my birthday last year and being in the crowd, being my biggest cheerleader. Ever since I met you, you always believed in me and saw the best in me. I am here to let you know that because of you I am working harder than ever to accomplish all my dreams and be a provider for you. I love you so much 😁😁

If You Was An Animal, What Would You Be?

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Full of patience

I wish for a lifespan

that extends

like Great Wall of China.

I pray for mental endurance

to keep my mind healthy

like a ocean.

I’m 1 out of 1000

and luck is my blessing.

I don’t drown, I’m swimming

towards a greater blessing.

Learning to slow down

and smell roses.

Learning to represent peace

while expressing deep emotions.

Strength and determination

to overcome every obstacle

and every challenege.

I carry the world on my shoulders

but my neck has the strength

of a mountain boulder.

Weather gets colder

but mind yet choose

to become wiser.

Been identified as being deep

like the sea.

If you was an animal, what would you be?

I Am In Love With My Seductive Next Door Neighbor (Part 2)

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Before Reading This Chapter You Must Read

 

Image result for down arrow gif

 

I Am In Love With My Seductive Next Door Neighbor (Part 1)

 

 

 Through out this series just so there is no confusion, I will be doing flashbacks where I may be describing a scene between characters where the characters are describing a scene that took place in the past. I hope all of reading this will enjoy this story because I have worked hard on this and I appreciate your support. 

Chapter 2

I’ve been with  James(Brittany’s Sugar Daddy) for a little over two years now but we known each other for a while.Image result for flashback gif Image result for arrows gif

We met at a strip club two years ago and I use to be a part time stripper. Stripping wasn’t my favorite profession but it paid the bills and my moves on the pole was cold as steel, but I was getting tired of this shit.

Selling the idea of sex and projecting yourself as sexy isn’t that easy when you not always feeling the mood.

All I knew was that I needed a sugar daddy like for real.Ever since junior high, I had attention from most of the guys.

My friends told me that I would be an amazing stripper because I had the type of ass that would make the average man dick harder than a block of ice.

This type of ass and my sexy ass skin complexion is what actually gave James social life some life.

To be honest when I first laid eyes on him,I knew he was lame.He had on the type of outfit where he was dressing like he can audition for “Save by the Bell”.

His black pants was so tight, he didn’t even need a belt.He had some weird looking bright ass yellow shirt that was probably brought from Target,plus he was wearing some white sketchers that matched my bedroom’s carpet.

James dressed like shit.

But one thing I know that the average stripper don’t know is that lame guys with no type of swag always have a fat wallet.

This ain’t junior high school , this is the real world and popularity to me don’t mean shit.

I knew James wouldn’t resist because I know I’m a bad bitch.

So you know, I go to where he was sitting at and I started giving him a lap dance without his permission.

His dick grew a little like Pinocchio’s nose but when I felt it though, it felt kind of small.

Overall compared to the average man’s physique,James is pretty small.He is about 5ft4, weigh about 130 pounds.

But I’ll excuse that because I’m curious to see how much $ is in his bank account.

So eventually I made small talk with him, boosted his ego, rubbed his penis, and twerked my ass in his face.

He started moaning loud and I believed by his face expression he nutted on himself.

I almost laughed out loud and it was hard to keep my laughter in.

I was almost certain he was a virgin.

I decided to ask him if he was and when I did, he was hesitant to answer.

I repeated myself, but this time I made my tone a little more sexier.

He told me wasn’t but has very little experience and suffers from premature ejaculation.

I was almost hesitant to do this, but  I whispered in James  left ear and offered him to buy me a Whiskey Sour.

So he went to the bar and got me drink.

He asking me questions like what your name, where you from, how old are you, and what made you become a stripper?

After I answered all of his questions, I was straight to the point with him and told him for 100 dollars I was willing to suck and ride his cock.

I gave him a offer he couldn’t refuse even though his swag is something I don’t approve I was just using him for financial needs because he was a nice guy and a sucka.

Image result for back to reality gifImage result for arrows gif 

               2 Year Later

One thing I was grateful for was that James moved me from the hood and promised me everything he could provide.

He really thinks that I love him and that I will one day will be his wife,but I ain’t bout that life.

This situation that me and him got was built off of lies.He don’t even know I’m fucking Kile(Jame’s college student) on the side.

The hospital I work at is not far from where Kile lives and all I know is this nightstick is black, long and thick.

He too is a cheater like me for not being satisfied in his  marriage.

But it’s not just in sex his marriage he is lacking.

So here I am two years later asking myself  why am I with this lame ass n*gga?

I mean he got a lot of figures but yet has an unattractive figure.

Sometimes I am bitter and have regrets for being a gold digga when I laid eyes on my next door neighbor and I am lusting hard after this fine as brother. 

Discussion Questions

 

  1. If you could use one word to describe Brittany, what word would you use?If you could use one word, to describe James, what word would that be?
  2. Can you have a successful marriage if you are married to a stripper?
  3. Why do you think James was at the strip club in the first place?
  4. Who do you think the next door neighbor that Brittany is referring to, is it Kile or somebody else?
  5. For Chapter 3, would you like to hear this story from James point of view or Kile’s point of view?
  6. Do you think James know that Brittany is having an affair his Kile, his college student?
  7. What subject do you think James teaches at college?
  8. Do you think this story is the prequel to my stories I written in the past “Don’t Tell A Soul(Chapter 1), Don’t Tell A Soul(Part 2), and Don’t Tell A Soul Part 3?
  9. What’s more powerful money or lust?
  10. Can you be happy in your marriage if you are not attracted to your spouse, but your spouse has the perfect personality that matches yours?

 Chapter 3 will be uploaded on April. I will be taking a break from uploading post because I am focusing on study for my Comptia A+ certification but I will still be around to read from other bloggers so in the mean time please follow me on

Instagram

LinkedIn

Wattpad.

Podcast

Quote of The Day- “Talent without popularity takes a while to get recognized but popularity is the substitute of the truth when the talent is lacking” – David Hockaday