I hate being around your presence.
It’s so fucking devastating
It’s so fucking frustrating.
I fell in love when you exit
for a brief moment.
Finally a second to breathe.
Quiet and peace.
Why did you have to come back?
Nobody likes you
So you should of never came back
I love you
but I don’t like you
I will kill for you
but sometimes
I want to fight you.
I will always thank God
for you
but alot of times
I hate being around you.
I admire your accomplishments
but I hate most conversations
I had with you.
Yeah to others
you appear as a hero
but behind close doors
I know the truth.
You will never read this
each secret
will be buried in the coffin
but if you do happen
to read this
it’s not hatred
just my emotions.
I love you
but I don’t like you.
I wake up
to you being here.
Why can’t you disappear?
It’s not fair
that your still here.
My peace and quiet just vanished.
For those of you reading this
you ever hate that one person
you hate having conversation with?
Its like talking to a brick.
You tried many times to
give that person chances
but the more you do
the more they get you fucking
frustrated.
It’s like when that person
is not around
I embrace not hearing the sound
of that voice.
That voice gives me constant headaches.
Taking up too much space
in my head.
The stress and bad thoughts spread and stretch out
like a pregnant stomach.
Everyday it’s always something.
Constant complaints and favors.
You will annoy me now
and later.
Maybe I should seek prayer.
But how I do that
when the bible says
you must obey your parents?
The distance between us is apparent.
I keep my distance
from you and your presence.
I had to really sit here
and think hard of the positives.
Head was scratching, eyes closing
to rewind and find
any precious times.
I didn’t seek many.
The many I seek were the negatives
while I reminisce.
Because of that one person
I despise my youth.
Felt misery since I was
a child.
Most days were rarely smooth
made it hard for me to smile.