It’s Painful To Hate Somebody You Love

I hate being around your presence.

It’s so fucking devastating

It’s so fucking frustrating.

I fell in love when you exit

for a brief moment.

Finally a second to breathe.

Quiet and peace.

Why did you have to come back?

Nobody likes you

So you should of never came back

I love you

but I don’t like you

I will kill for you

but sometimes

I want to fight you.

I will always thank God

for you

but alot of times

I hate being around you.

I admire your accomplishments

but I hate most conversations

I had with you.

Yeah to others

you appear as a hero

but behind close doors

I know the truth.

You will never read this

each secret

will be buried in the coffin

but if you do happen

to read this

it’s not hatred

just my emotions.

I love you

but I don’t like you.

I wake up

to you being here.

Why can’t you disappear?

It’s not fair

that your still here.

My peace and quiet just vanished.

For those of you reading this

you ever hate that one person

you hate having conversation with?

Its like talking to a brick.

You tried many times to

give that person chances

but the more you do

the more they get you fucking

frustrated.

It’s like when that person

is not around

I embrace not hearing the sound

of that voice.

That voice gives me constant headaches.

Taking up too much space

in my head.

The stress and bad thoughts spread and stretch out

like a pregnant stomach.

Everyday it’s always something.

Constant complaints and favors.

You will annoy me now

and later.

Maybe I should seek prayer.

But how I do that

when the bible says

you must obey your parents?

The distance between us is apparent.

I keep my distance

from you and your presence.

I had to really sit here

and think hard of the positives.

Head was scratching, eyes closing

to rewind and find

any precious times.

I didn’t seek many.

The many I seek were the negatives

while I reminisce.

Because of that one person

I despise my youth.

Felt misery since I was

a child.

Most days were rarely smooth

made it hard for me to smile.