Do you tend to hold a grudge or to forgive and forget?

“When you hold a grudge, you want someone else’s sorrow to reflect your level of hurt but the two rarely meet.” – Steve Maraboli

The quote above inspired me to write this poem

Holding a grudge
because feeling like
you need crutches
for being hurt.
People will make you feel
lower than dirt.
Thinking of the memory,
intertwined with tight body
will be an emotional feeling
and a vibration goes beyond the body.
Like Michael Jackson
remember the time,
but not when you fell in love
but when your fell in love
with pain and torment.
Mass destruction
because individuals are destructive
tossing bombs at you
like your a target.
Now have to go thru a healing process.
Healing process is like boot camp
and doing agility and speed drills
tripping over tires
and the mud on the grass is damp.
We rather be clean
but why does it take so long
to shower off the mud?
We hold on to the sludge
attached to our body
and we blame
the person that pushed
us in the mud.
We hold a grudge
because instead of showering
we stay covered in slime
and sludge
for attention
for other to witness.
These are our lowest moments
because we think we receive
but in reality
nobody gives a fuck.
Caring what other think
about you
will have you holding grudges
when every time you get offended
or stuck in fetal position
in the corner of your room
Hardest thing to accomplish
is learning the art of forgiving.


Letting the past go isn’t always easy
Your past is your own personal history 
A history textbook in  which can be access by using your memory
The past can be moments of happiness or moments of misery

There is always something that reminds us of the past
Use the 5 senses 
Sight, hearing, touch, taste, smell
You see something that reminds you of the past
You hear something that reminds you of the past
You touch something that reminds you of the past
You smell something that reminds you of the past

Life of living in the past is a fatal addiction
Makes you worry  like a crazy maniac which leads to a life of unsatisfication

Your mind is your greatest weapon when it comes to surviving

In order to live in this cold world, remember the statement I wrote above if you want to live in peace and satisfaction

Even though the past is not fiction, learn to let it go because you not focusing on what’s really important
Which is the present
In reality you living in the present
No matter how painful the the past, you can always make your future brighter by focusing on the present
Someone once told me if God creates the past and the future, why worry about it.

This is only dedicated to one person.
Can you tell me who this person is?
Not only I want you to think about it, I want you to answer it?
I wrote this on November 7 2014
At 7:00 AM

Comment below and explain why do we hold grudges for so long?

34 thoughts on “Do you tend to hold a grudge or to forgive and forget?

  1. I love when you said (paraphrasing) consider the 5 senses when you think of the past – I never looked at it that way but you’re so spot on….there are things that do remind us of the past and those things are all in the those 5 senses – there are certain songs I can hear now, that puts me back somewhere in the past because it was something going on when I first heard the tune and etc. I think people hold on to grudges for a long time because that’s their way of having some type of control over the situation in which isn’t helping’em but hurting’em. Wouldn’t have thought you wrote this 4 years ago – who did you write it for?

    • ” I think people hold on to grudges for a long time because that’s their way of having some type of control over the situation in which isn’t helping’em but hurting’em. ” i agree with this completely so true.
      I wrote this for my ex I was dating back in 2014.
      It was a long story. I felt she didn’t love me and there were things that I couldn’t let go which result in me breaking up with her

  2. Beautiful thoughts…and so well expressed! I cannot agree more…the best feeling by far, letting go of the hurt and moving on…I cannot but recommend this because of the sheer power of the thought that we forgive and rise above the pettiness of retaliation and thereby become greater in stature than those that hurt us.

    • Exactly!
      Holding a grudge is easy but it does more harm to you spiritually and mentally.
      It’s like doing drugs, the high feels good but in the long run, it damages your body

  3. I harbor a terrible hate inside my heart and I am not ready to forgive and forget yet. Truly impressive work. I’ve been roaming around WordPress and I am glad I came upon this post. Very inspiring.
    Hey, I am Ragazza, I hope you could follow my blog page if you don’t mind. Cheers! 🙂

  4. Another touching subject and so relatable my man. I think people hold grudges, and I’m not excluded because I’m human, because it’s like your quote said, you want someone else’s sorrow to reflect your level of hurt. Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to get sick, it’s a selfish battle. I think this was written in light of you because of the line remember the time. When we tend to write in the past, we usually bring a memory from our past and incorporate it into our own poetry in some way. We want people to care what we think and if they don’t, that’s how our grudges toward them are escalated. If they aren’t bothered by our actions, it makes us more angry, especially if we can’t find the right allies to join in our grudge.
    You’re so right, when you get so invested in a grudge, it’s hard letting it go because you tend to have flashbacks of what happened, what went down and the pain you went through and forgiving makes it hard. And it’s tough when you have a mentality “it’s a cold world, sometimes you gotta provide your own heat” way of thinking. But I’ve learned that when you hold grudges, your hands aren’t free to catch blessings.
    It’s hard to forgive and forget but it’s easier to forget and then forgive. 😉

    • “It’s hard to forgive and forget but it’s easier to forget and then forgive. ”
      Interesting point of view
      I decided to write about his because I know for a fact this might be my most relatable topic.
      A lot of other bloggers wrote about this as well.
      Forgiving I believe is like one of the hardest thing to do.
      Forgiving is mistaken for weakness.
      Sometimes people will hold a grudge and stay quiet and act like your friend instead of telling you how they feel.
      Grudges with someone in the past can affect a future relationship with someone will you meet in the future.
      Anger consumes you soul and deteriorate your mind into thinking that everybody is against you.
      This world is a place where it’s difficult to adapt to their environment so its basically survival of the fittest.
      Once you understand that some people in life are evil and everybody is not your friend, you understand how to let go when your beating up mentally by the demons in the world.

      • So very true, that’s why they say don’t mistake kindness for weakness because forgiving is kind. Grudges not only affect future relationships with people you’ll meet, but it can also affect family life too because like you said, that hatred consumes you. But when you develop that attitude that the world is against you, it’s real hard to fight a battle all alone, sometimes that person we held a grudge against may have to give us a weapon.
        It’s true that everyone isn’t wearing a pair of wings but we can’t assume that everyone we meet will one day let us down because someone in our past did us wrong. It’s one thing to let go but it’s another thing to let alone.

      • i completely agree with this. Also people hold grudges because they are waiting for an apology that may never come. Sometimes you just have to forgive before the apology happens.
        The world is with and against you at the same time.
        It’s all about the way you perceive the world in your mind.
        Grudges sometimes leads to revenge.
        Revenge can lead to misery.
        Can’t be happy unless you let go what bothers you in your heart.
        The way of letting go to forgive yourself and appreicate the lesson instead of looking at it as wasted time

      • Very true, grudges are about being delivered an apology, an apology you might not even accept at that because you held on to hate for so long. You’re so right, you do have to forgive before the apology happens, sometimes the student has to teach the class.
        There will always be foes and allies in our minds, it’s all about who we draft in our heads. They say misery loves company and if you make it, you’ll sit with it.
        But it’s like you said, you have to forgive yourself before you can forgive others, that’s where the healing starts. Start feasting on forgiveness and stop getting full off of ego.

      • Yes
        This comment was on point.
        Sometimes it’s easier to forgive an enemy that you always hated then a very close friend member that broke your heart.
        Forgiveness does take time.
        Jealously and holding grudges are 2 deadly emotions that can lead to violence.
        If those 2 emotions didn’t exist, imagine what the world would be like

      • Very true, without those two emotions a lot of people wouldn’t have such spite for each other. Forgiveness would be a lot less needed.

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