If Today Was Your Last Day, How Would You Want Your Family Members To Remember You?

 Click play button to listen to me recite this poem #np on #SoundCloud
 
If I could go back to the day where I can  fix what held me back I would be able to trust myself Here am I with a picture of memories thinking of hurting myself. All I need is a chance in a  day One shot, one place to fix my mistakes that I made, vomiting all of the pain. If I had one angel and a prophet to guide me safe along the way. Cup of holy water, mixed with wine anointing myself as I lay across the sofa. Re-learn all the politics so I could use to my advantage. Need the sermons to subdue the hollowness in my heart affected by relationships. Shallowness are common in companionships. Life is a bitch and she will suck the life out of you like a woman that's avoiding conception but ironically life is a blessing. Blessings are only appreciated when  materialistic things involved. Motivation dissolved since good times don't last forever. Felt type of pain like a heartbroken mother because her  daughter commit suicide. Never saw the defeat in her eyes since the smile was a disguise, hiding the true feeling inside. Friends are really spies watching from a distance like binoculars zooming in until they found a weakness and use it to their advantage and catch you blinded sided like driving and getting hit from the right side. We don't wanna be right when logic and emotion aren't on the same side. We do what feels good instead of what's actually  right. Getting high in the hood feels right being up all night because loud music don't know the difference between night and daylight. Converse more with strangers on social media then family members.
I'm trapped in a circle,
Stuck in a bubble 
Nowhere to go 
Blessing since trouble 
is within my distance.
Walls are 
closing in towards 
the skin 
on my bones 
Me and my shadow 
all alone 
for so long
but the gray hairs 
on my ears 
reminds me that
life is short.

Drunk off of hallucinations
Pictures, images 
extremely haunted, 
existent upon
the environment.
I don't comprehend 
eccentric expressions 
in the area.
The length and width 
of these images  
are possessed with spirits
which penetrates 
my mental anguish.

First of all 
I ask lord to forgive me.
For my loves ones, 
listen to me
before you speak.
Don't act first 
please think.
For every waking
moment that I breathe
I live a lie
a double life
and I wonder how 
I sleep?
I lie to seek peace.
Mentally I'm weak
like a sheep
surrounded by a world 
full of German Shepard's 
and wolves
and I'm terrified 
karma will charge 
me like a bull.
Doing something you hate
I believe is a disgrace 
and a waste.
Wasted talent 
should not be any man's plan
even though this is 
something that's so common.
Alot of the most talented 
men are serving a life sentence 
in prison.
I think to myself 
money, goals, and success 
Don't mean shit without happiness.


What Do You Believe Is The Most Common Mistake Made On The 1st Date?

This post is not a poem. Today I decided to post something that I read on social media that have caught my attention.
I will keep this short and simple

I read on social media about how this woman went on a date with this guy. This guy spent 200 dollars on the 1st date and he assumed that he was going to have sex with this women when he walked her to the door. She felt the vibe that he wanted to have sex. So she told him to go to the store and buy condoms and she also told him that she was going to hop in the shower real quick and wait for him and let him in when he comes back from 7-11.. As soon as he left to go to 7-11 to buy condoms, she close the door and locked it and blocked his number and never spoke to him again.

1) After reading this, what is your opinion on this situation?

2) What is your opinion about this man based on reading this? Did he make any mistakes? Do you think he is naive?

3) What do you believe are common mistakes that people make on 1st dates?

4) How much money is appropiate to spend on a first date?

5) Is it appropriate to have sex on the 1st date?

6) What is your opinion about this woman based on reading this? Do you agree with what she did? Do you think she is ungrateful?

7) If your child was 18 and they told you that they had sex on the 1st date, how would you respond?

8) Why do men assume sex is guaranteed if they spent alot money on a date?

9) How common do you think sex on the first date happens?

10) Do you think it’s better to have sex on the first date or to wait until you are married to have sex? If you had to choose, what would you pick?

11) This question is for women, if your in a relationship, do you expect your boyfriend to pay to get your hair and nails done?

Pick one question that your caught your attention the most and comment below and I will respond to your comment regarding my opinion.

How do you feel about gossip?

2 Corinthians 12:20

“For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder.”

The first poem explains how gossip can destroy your career. Remember it’s all business

No Soul On Ice

When it’s below freezing
in their hearts
by any means necessary
make each day hard
Slowly destroying
and taking
credit for everything
you got.
Judgmental views
and they leave clues
and the words chew
your powerful tool.
I’m talking about
your mind
when in a political bind.
Your intellect is insulted,
heart is assaulted.
Though they don’t
seem belligerent,
will be quick to attack
you with kindness.
Are you confused
or blinded?
A hero they impersonate
but they are really snakes
act fake.
Contaminate, spike, and lace
the fluid
you need in order to live.
Leave you leaking
like oil from an engine.
Slowly dying
as you crying
begging for forgivness.
A hockey ring
with no hockey players
is symbolic and resides
deep inside
the liver.
Every organ inside shivers
like the homeless man
in winter.
Change color
like teeth
when you don’t brush them.
from bright white
to dark yellow
is the description
of your fellow
classmates and co-workers
as you complain
to your scoial worker
about the abuse and treatment
you receiving.
She speaks with a voice soft
that’s soothing.
Tell you the rights thing
she has your attention
and you are listening.
You are complaining
about a racist
Mention his name
Social worker hear this
and seems sympathetic.
She hugs you
makes you comfortable
Tells you
she looks forward
to seeing you next week
but in this world
trust in weak.
She has a fling thing
with the social service director
and he is related
to the racist
you were describing
You mentioned the racist name
and she passes the information
so she can get promotion.
Destruction because of corruption
and you don’t know it
You was betrayed by a deceiving
woman
who told you
everything you say
is confidential.
Promises are always broken
when someone is addicted
to attention.
The only mentor
you had
turns her back
on loyalty
for money.
A mixture of serpents
and Judas
Such a bad combination
Your life now headed for destruction
and you don’t even know it.
Social service director
has connections
to destroy your future forever
A soon to be lesson you
will remember
The temperture of the heart
of most
is a hockey ring without
hockey players
No Soul on Ice

This next poem explains on how to watch out for people that gossip because that ones that gossip are usually your enemies pretending to be your friend.

Play The Snake Close

So crafty and set
in their ways.
Play games and
cause pain.
Big smile across
the face
as they surround
negativity around
your space.
Attack behind your
back
and kill you with kindness.
With you they pretend
to laugh
but they laughing at you.
Can’t keep tounges
in their mouth
and you is all
they gossip about.
Snakes in church
accept blessings
but corrupted at work
by abusing power
making employees lives
harder
getting hardworking people
fired.
Snakes preach
forgive and forget
as a tatic
to avoid static
when they see a threat
so they rather
attack a rabbit
and that’s their habit
weak is their addiction,
that they poison, corrupt
and devour
because snakes are cowards.
You ever seen a snake
attack a hawk?
A hawk is the threat
that won’t be lead to
death
and they see everything
from right and left
Become the hawk
that play the snake close

Does Rumors Override Facts?

Believe what you hear, believe what you see but yet you don’t look in the glass.
You state you listen before you speak, but still gossip about someone’s past.
Why be the road bump to someone’s path,
decreasing a person’s reputation on the bar graph?
You may face karma for taking adavantage of the popularity your given
and exposing the negative attention that someone else is receiving.
Even if the truth is accurate, his business is his business
even if you was a eye witness.
but in this case you wasn’t and I’m starting to think are you jealous to believe something
when you wasn’t there from the beginning.
Secondary info carries more weight that
the primary facts
when the secondary info is heavy like a wooden baseball bat
and primary facts holds no weight like a empty scale.
This jealously of yours may trap you like a whale and karma is the harpoon.
Problem is popularity overrides the truth
Gossip is a huge problem. Two most common places I believe people gossip the most at school, work and church, but why does gossip happens? Comment below and explain briefly why you think people like to gossip?

Do you think people would still gossip if jeasouly in people hearts did not exist?

Do quiet people gossip the most(remember they say quiet people are the ones you have to watch)?

Listen to No Soul On Ice by David Hockaday #np on #SoundCloud

Listen to Play The Snake close/Does Rumors Override Facts by David Hockaday #np on #SoundCloud

If you want to listen to me recite the poems I wrote, please use the web browser to search these links if you have sound cloud. Please comment below if you was able to play the video. If you wasn’t I apologize ahead of time and I will fix this shortly

Do you tend to hold a grudge or to forgive and forget?

“When you hold a grudge, you want someone else’s sorrow to reflect your level of hurt but the two rarely meet.” – Steve Maraboli

The quote above inspired me to write this poem

Holding a grudge
because feeling like
you need crutches
for being hurt.
People will make you feel
lower than dirt.
Thinking of the memory,
intertwined with tight body
sensations
will be an emotional feeling
and a vibration goes beyond the body.
Like Michael Jackson
remeber the time,
but not when you fell in love
but when your fell in love
with pain and torment.
Mass destruction
becuase individuals are destructive
tossing bombs at you
like your a target.
Now have to go thru a healing process.
Healing process is like boot camp
and doing agility and speed drills
tripping over tires
and the mud on the grass is damp.
We rather be clean
but why does it take so long
to shower off the mud?
We hold on to the sludge
attached to our body
and we blame
the person that pushed
us in the mud.
We hold a grudge
becuase instead of showering
we stay covered in slime
and sludge
for attention
for other to witness.
These are our lowest moments
because we think we receive
sympathy
but in reality
nobody gives a fuck.
Caring what other think
about you
will have you holding grudges
when every time you get offended
or stuck in fetal position
in the corner of your room
crying.
Hardest thing to accomplish
is learning the art of forgiving.

 

Letting the past go isn’t always easy
Your past is your own personal history 
A history textbook in  which can be access by using your memory
The past can be moments of happiness or moments of misery

There is always something that reminds us of the past
Use the 5 senses 
Sight, hearing, touch, taste, smell
You see something that reminds you of the past
You hear something that reminds you of the past
You touch something that reminds you of the past
You smell something that reminds you of the past

Life of living in the past is a fatal addiction
Makes you worry  like a crazy maniac which leads to a life of unsatisfication

Your mind is your greatest weapon when it comes to surviving

In order to live in this cold world, remember the statement I wrote above if you want to live in peace and satisfaction

Even though the past is not fiction, learn to let it go because you not focusing on what’s really important
Which is the present
In reality you living in the present
No matter how painful the the past, you can always make your future brighter by focusing on the present
Someone once told me if God creates the past and the future, why worry about it.

This is only dedicated to one person.
Can you tell me who this person is?
Not only I want you to think about it, I want you to answer it?
I wrote this on November 7 2014
At 7:00 AM

Comment below and explain why do we hold grudges for so long?

What Was My Greatest Compliment I Received?

For those of you reading this, what was the greatest compliment you received?

James 1:17

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

This verse relates to the poem I wrote. God gets all the glory because God blessed me having a friend that helped me to discover my talent for writing poetry. I’m not perfect, I’m not a super religious person, I do sin everday, but my heart is in the right place. So every poem for now on will be dedicated to the lord. For those of you have trouble finding success with blogging, put the lord first in everything you do becuase only the Lord’s opinion matters.

My most challenging poem
as I stare in the mirror alone.
Lone wolf all my life
as I have this pen in
my hand trying to write,
closing my eyes
trying to find a memory
where I received compliments
or when I accomplish something.
At 17 getting my driver license,
At 18 hearing my family cheer
at my high school graduation.
My parents told me
they was proud
but I thinks it’s an exaggeration.
To me those are average accomplishments
To be honest I don’t brag about my acheveiments
since I hate being center of attention.
Been told I am an over thinking
at age 24.
I’m logical but when it comes to thinking
I know I over due it for sure.
My thought process is like long division.
Mind is balanced like an equation,
before I make a serious decision
I focus on one thought at a time.
I take the whole paragraph of thoughts
in my mind and divide.
Sometimes thoughts don’t evenly
equal or connect to each other.
So I keep searching deep for thoughts
and dividing my thoughts
until I eliminate the remainder
of left over thoughts that won’t balance,
complicating and preventing the situation
from arriving a solution.
The way most people think relates to solving
division on calculator.
My thinking relates to solving division on paper.
It takes me longer to find an answer to a
complicated solution
and some will say my thinking is useless
and some may even say I am brainless
but the difference between
me and others
is I don’t rely on technology
to expose how talented that I am.
I will reiterate that
It takes me longer to find an answer to a
complicated solution
some will say my thinking is useless,
some may even say I am brainless
but the difference between
me and others
is I don’t rely on technology
to expose how talented that I am.
In the inside, my smile is brighter
then Sam I Am with green eggs and ham.
Technology make you way of thinking lazy
and technology becomes replaced
with new technology
but hard work and natural talent
will always follow you like a shadow
everytime you leave your house to travel
This is the greatest compliment I received
from staring at my reflection.
I am motivated by self motivation.

Compliments are words
as I think of images
of the past
of being told
I was unique.
I remained humble
when I received
the compliment.
My everlasting pain
momentarily turned
into pleasure.
Weight on my shoulders
became light as a feather.
I wonder if compliments
stab deeper than criticism.
Criticism will have you feeling
like your at the bottom of the prymaid.
The compliment I received
lighten the path to prepare me
for a better future.
I’m a consumer and a carnivore
and negative words is the herbivore
I devour for energy and power
So I can look forward into thanking
God for waking me up tomorrow.
I control my own thinking
so think of me like pest control
killing negativity like exterminator
exterminating rodents.
Or think of me like a snake
that rattle rodents,
Or a dolphin swimming in an ocean
of compliments
that I’m receiving
Heart is warm like the temperature
in Florida
and I don’t fear the hurricane
and my thoughts is Florida houses
that I can replace
when my mind collapse on a bad day
like a California house
during an earthquake.
Today is tomorrow’s yesterday
and I celebrate when I stare at my face
in the mirror
every morning
to remind me that
the biggest compliment
comes the God almighty.
Sometimes we act like desperate side chicks
not knowing what our mind and heart is worth.
We get sucked in by demons
for allowing our nightmares affect us from sleeping.
From fetal, to the stomach, to the back
we can’t find a comfortable position.
So we remain restless.
But for every skill we lack,
someone will be there to give you an compliment.
This was my greatest lesson,
and this lesson will be the most potent
until I reach heaven.
My life’s meaning is the number 7
like in the book of gensis
becuase God told me
I am one of his greatest creation.

My Friend And I

Psalm 91:4

He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection

This verse from the bible and it gave me motivation to write this poem. Everything I do, I put God first and for now on, every poem that I write, I will add a bible verse that relates to my poem.

When the sun rose this morning,
I looked up but felt chills and my arms are slightly shivering.
Today is a cloudy windy day,
but yet I feel so great,
like its a clear sunny day.
The sun represent the brighter side of our lives.
Our hopes will forever be high with my Friend and I.
He speaks but don’t give me eye contact.
His words I choose to listen to and they attract,
me and gives me faith.
Two minds think alike and we can relate,
to each other,
like identical twin brothers.
Like a hidden fossil, I discovered,
him. He is my friend and I am his.
He is not on top of my list,
He is my first and only gift.
He is my solar energy he reminds me of the wind.
He has no voice, but can be heard if I listen.
The sound traveled through my ears as he speak to me indirectly.
No one can’t hear him except me.
With my imagination, he stands besides me.
To others it’s insanity,
To me its the way of life,
for my Friend and I.

1) Have you ever had an invisible friend when you was younger?

2) Do you have a friend that is no longer with you that you think about every single day?

3) Do you talk to yourself on a regular basis?

4) Do you have that type of friend that you love to be around no matter how bad your day is because your friend brings so much joy, happiness, and confidence?

My Purpose

I scrutinize the face and human eyes
and analyze.
Some say I look hypnotized.
I concentrate to see the disgiuse behind
to see if people are mystified.
To see if they provide for what they lack inside.
Skeletons and devils choose to hide.
I verbally don’t express my right
as I watch from the side
and prepare for a plan to lead to their demise.
My lips are sealed but the music amplifies my mind.
I purposely choose to remain shy
but yet mind can be dark like the clouds
in the sky
during a thunderstorm.
I’m unique and I choose not to conform
to the norm in society.
So I constantly keep my mind reformed
and my brain cells is plenty
like the semen that brought me life.
I refuse to allow the world to put me in a frenzy
but like a roof I have moments when I
decline
since procrastination can be deadly
like venom
which spreads becuase of snakes in life,
but I stand tall and fight
and remind myself it’s all mental.
The intellectual process in my mind
in which I describe is clear-sighted.
Well read and intellectually nimble
Some say I’m related to a gerbil.
Non-social but yet curious about my environment
is what the ordinary person is describing
when observing me as a person.
The people in the vicinity is what I’m inspecting.
Jealously and hate I notice and always expecting.
Comprehending the disloyal helps
me to appreciate those that are loyal.
My personality so distinguished
and I learn to relinquish the grip
that made me hate myself.
It’s hard to tell at first
but watch me closely
and you will see I choose to excel.
One step at a time as I inhale and exhale.
Worst feeling is feeling guilty as hell
for failing
when you was trying to do well.
Lord would speak to me through dreams
painting a picture of whales
to expose how I was gifted with intuition and awareness.
My sense of spirituality will overcome darkness
like the light that separates from darkness
for a solution due to the war in heaven.
For every demon, I surround myself with 2 angels.
I live life according to the 2:1 ratio
which God will annihilate the Devil.